What Am I Doing Here?

It's one of those questions that feels simple on the surface but hits in a dozen directions at once. It’s like when someone asks, “How are you?” and you say, “Fine!” even though, internally, you’re like, “…hanging on by a thread.” And you get the sense that the person asking is also hanging on by a thread, but no one’s saying it. I've always felt that disconnect between what’s said and what’s actually felt to be a really interesting space to explore.

I can tell you that I've been circling around this question for most of my life, especially growing up between cultures. I remember moments as a kid where I felt caught between languages, homes, and identities — not quite here nor there. That in-between space has always stirred a kind of low-grade anxiety in me. But I’ll save the long version for another time...

Anyway, what am I doing here? Like, with this newsletter. Honestly, I'm not totally sure yet. This’ll probably be a bit of a mixed bag for both of us, haha — which I'm excited about! At least a little more precisely, I think I'm carving out this space to catch thoughts I might’ve otherwise lost, to share what I'm working on, some of my process, reflections, and what I'm picking up along the way. A space to support my creative work as I figure things out.